I am very passionate about my relationships, especially with the one I love. The beginning of a new relationship is always the best and the easiest part. Growing and maintaining a healthy relationship is a bit more difficult for a lot of people. It doesn't have to be so difficult.
Think about it, of all the things that we deal with and go through each and everyday, your relationship with your significant should be the last thing you have to worry about. When you go home at the end of the day, that relationship, your partner should be your comfort, your safe haven. A relationship is not 50/50. It is and should always be 110/110. If you put in anything less than that, that's what you should expect to get out of it.
In order to have a successful , life long healthy relationship, it must include some important ingredients. You must first love yourself and also know what your needs are. You have to be confident in yourself and know your own worth before you can be in a successful relationship.
It's imperative to to seek God first for all of your needs and wants. He already knows what we need and the desires of our hearts. If you seek Him first, everything else will fall into place. You can even ask Him to show you how to love your partner, to love them through you. He will do it! All you have to do is ask and have that desire in your heart. That is when the seed of a healthy long lasting relationship is planted. It is then up to you to nurture and water that seed so it will continue to grow.Special nutrients are needed to ensure this precious seed given to you and planted for you, grows strong and stays alive.
There of course is no such thing as a perfect person or a perfect relationship.If you have this mindset, that will be a big downfall for you. You must do more than your best, put in all you can humanly possible into your relationship.
The most important nutrient is prayer. Pray for your partner as well as yourself. Ask God to show you what you are missing. Ask Him to show you things you need to see or what you need to know about yourself and your partner. Pray together, stay together.God does work in mysterious ways. He works in His time but on time.
Value and respect your partner. Be certain your partner always knows without a shadow of doubt that of course after God, he/she comes first. In my relationship, I have to know that I am number one. I'm not saying he would have to ditch everything he's doing for me. If I love him I definitely wouldn't expect that. But when it comes down to it, I have to know that no matter who walks by or no matter what anyone says or does, Im the one and the only one. Your partner should not have to ask or wonder how you feel about them. Let him/her know you appreciate him.
Keep the lines of communication open. Wether good or bad don't hesitate to tell your partner how you feel. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Always do it in a respectful way. We are not good mind readers. Don't be too quick to assume or jump to conclusions. This is another downfall in relationships. Actions always speaks louder.
Intimacy is extremely important with me. It is essential in relationships. Intimacy is more than just sex. It's when you experience a closeness with your partner. Pillow talk, hold hands, cuddle, dinner and a movie. Do something special for and with each other. This strengthens your bond as well.
There are many creative ways to let your partner know how you feel about them. A few of my ideas are:
1. Make a love journal or scrap book. I have a one and the first page I used stickers to say "I found my smile again." As I start to eventually fill in the pages, my partner will see what makes me smile! I have also made a love journal. This is good especially when you don't live with your partner or maybe if they are deployed or just away. It's still a good idea even if you see him everyday. Write the things you never said, the things you don't express everyday. You will be amazed at how love makes you a poet or an awesome writer.
2. Make a cd with songs letting your partner know how they make you feel and what you think of them, Think of it like an audio love letter.
Go out of your way, be creative, be original. Flirt, date, make little love coupons for your partner to use anytime. One of my favorite sites to get ideas from is loving you.com.Always continue to add value to your relationship. It's not always about the money you spend but the thought and the effort you put into it. Remember you get what you give. These are only a few things that holds the foundation of your relationship together. Don't give up on your partner. Don't give up on yourself.