These are the song titles that describe my 2010. Only the title of the song, not necessarily the lyrics to the song.

~ I'm Here

~I've Changed

~I'm Not Complete (Dave Hollister, lyrics an all!)

~Take Care of Home

~No One Else

~I'm So Excited

~So Anxious

~I Love You

~SLeeping Pill

~Take Flight

~Best I Ever Had ;)



All of these song titles refer to one thing or another in my life during 2010.

The events in my life help make me!


Just wanted to let you know I don't have internet access at the moment but I will be posting a few things shortly. Stay tuned!

It made me think about this year 2010. When it started, I physically felt this change inside me. It was more than a new year’s resolution. It was a confidence, motivation, determination. 2010 was the “NextLevel” for me.
I vowed I would not live another day feeling as low and alone as I did. I was angry, bitter, and resentful. I had hate in me. I was cheating myself.
You won’t make it to the next level (up) with those thoughts and feelings.
So I ran. I thought I was just taking myself out of a bad situation and out of the life I hated. Instead I was running. I left the situation but I did not deal with it. There were things I needed to do and take care of. I left my work undone.
“Those who are impatient, wait twice.”
Well I’m back in the situation, right before 2011. Guess what? I’m handling my ishh this time!
When I leave this time, everyone will know it, and the door will be closed and another opened.
In the song “Take Me as I am” it says she has no regrets and she accepts the past because all these things helped make she. Had I not gone through the things I did this year I would not know what I know now. I am on a different level in many aspects of my life and it feels good.
The enemy tried to take me down many times this year. I won’t brag or challenge the enemy but I will say this, You are slick and tough, you shoot to kill, I give you that but I’m tougher.. Go home!

She’s older and wiser now, God’s got my back. How else would I have made it through?
I am confident and it’s far from over. At one point this year, a couple weeks ago, I admitted that I wish God would have taken me in that car accident I was in. I immediately asked for forgiveness because that was stupid. I was in Dallas, on a 4 lane highway, in the furthest lane to the left. I was in a car, and hit by a huge van going at least 65+ mph. I walked away with an eye swollen shut. I went home that night. I didn’t even see the inside of the ambulance or hospital. I’m here for a really good reason!
You might be able to knock me down but you can’t hold me down.
Just like my dad says:
"Byrddog, the only dog that won’t bark will bite, last to run first to fight!
Bow wow!"
This is the real me!

Three Bullets

There once was a man who had nothing for his family to eat. He had an old rifle and three bullets. So, he decided that he would go out hunting and kill some wild game for dinner. As he went down the road, he saw a rabbit. He shot at the rabbit and missed it. The rabbit ran away. Then he saw a squirrel and fired a shot at the squirrel and missed it. The squirrel disappeared into a hole in a cottonwood tree. As he went further, he saw a large wild 'Tom' turkey in the tree, but he had only one bullet remaining. A voice spoke to him and said, 'Pray first, aim high and stay focused.

However, at the same time, he saw a deer which was a better kill. He brought the gun down and aimed at the deer. But, then he saw a rattlesnake between his legs about to bite him, so he naturally brought the gun down further to shoot the rattlesnake. Still, the voice said again to him, 'I said 'Pray, Aim high and Stay focused.'

So, the man decided to listen to God's voice.

He prayed, then aimed the gun high up in the tree and shot the wild turkey. The bullet bounced off the turkey and killed the deer. The handle fell off the gun and hit the snake in the head and killed it. And, when the gun had gone off, it knocked him into a pond. When he stood up to look around, he had fish in all his pockets, a dead deer and a turkey to eat for his family.

The snake (Satan) was dead simply because the man listened to God.

Moral of the story:

Pray first before you do anything, aim and shoot high in your goals, and stay focused on God. Never let others discourage you concerning your past. The past is exactly that, 'the past.' Live every day one day at a time and remember that only God knows our future and that he will not! put you through any more than you can bear.

Do not look to man for your blessings, but look to the doors that only He has prepared in advance for you in your favor.

Wait, be still and patient: keep God first and everything else will follow.

Pass this on in order that someone else might be blessed.


Don't worry about tomorrow, God is already there!!!


One of the best things my sister always told me was "you choose." Of course I didn't understand it quite like she meant. It just wasn't my time yet I guess. It too several years and going through some things, meeting certain people for me to get it.
You have to choose who you want to be with don’t let them choose you. Don't settle for the person that seems to be the only person around when you’re lonely. Choose the one who makes you laugh and smile. Choose the one who supports you and your decisions, likes and dislikes. Choose the one who knows your faults and weaknesses but looks beyond that because he knows your worth and knows what he has or would have, having you.
Choose the one you know would still bring sunshine in your worst, gloomiest day. Choose the one who encourages you to be yourself, who has seen the real you, stripped naked (not literally)... Well maybe that too! lol
This person will still love you anyway. No one is perfect but choose the one who encourages you and helps you become and continue to be a better person. Take the time to get to know your partners weaknesses. Will they have your back when you feel like you don't have one? Can you still stand strong and have their back through just about anything? Can you both hold it down for each other when you need it most in life? Now that's a life partner for ya!

2010 is almost over! Just like a dear friend said "Don't look at it as a means to an end but a beginning." I thought I would sum up my year 2010 with the 10 best words. Positive words only.

1. Determined
2. Hopeful
3. Reflect
4. Survived!
5. Manifested
6. Persevere
7. reform
8. Grow
9. Love
10. Learn

My best hopes for 2011 in one word:

1. Purge
2. Inspire
3. Discipline
4. Complete
5. Work
6. Provide
7. Focus
8. Prioritize
9. stability
10. Prosper!

I got this from a yahoo group I'm in and thought I HAD to share!


Can you cry under water?

If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway...

Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

If the professor on Gilligan's Islandcan make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Why, Why, Why ….

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE...

The statistics on insanity are that one out of every four person is suffering from some sort of mental illness.

Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you!

I just did my workout. 30 minutes of Hip Hop Abs. It is an awesome fun workout. You sweat and its fun! You can crank up the music and just dance. You don't even realize your workout out. I love it!
Check out a clip of it.. If you would like to buy it go to

Being pretentious, hiding your weaknesses and failing to reflect on yourself will only limit your growth and potential.

We have both a weak self and a strong self; the two are completely different. If we allow our weak side to dominate, we will surely be defeated.

Those who are always complaining about their circumstances find that success continually eludes them. As do those who speak ill of others or who make excuses for their failures.

When your determination changes, everything will begin to move in the direction you desire. The moment you resolve to be victorious, every nerve and fiber in your being will immediately orient itself toward your success. On the other hand, if you think, "This is never going to work out," then at that instant every cell in your being will be deflated and give up the fight. Then everything really will move in the direction of failure.

It is not difficult circumstances that defeat one, but one's own weakness.

Being pretentious, hiding your weaknesses and failing to reflect on yourself will only limit your growth and potential.

These words of wisdom really mean something to me. I will be looking at these everyday for a daily boost. I hope it helps you too!

"So many of life's conflicts find their origin and cause in envy. Envy ruins and destroys people's hearts."

I have been through many crazy things in my life. I have learned a lot, grown a lot and even failed some. Right now, I have this tornado whirling around inside me. I have tried to make sense of it all for many years, searched for a solution or a way to control my emotions. I've turned to the internet, books and yes I have prayed about it. I will admit that I have looked to the internet and books more often than I have prayed about it.
So I can say Im blessed even during my storm because God hasn't let me fall or given up on me. I can tell he's waiting on me to do something. I can feel a cover of protection over me. It's like when you teach a baby to walk or teach your child to ride a bike or skate. You know they're going to fall and you even let them to an extent but you won't let them get hurt.
That's waht God does for us, that is, if we do our part. He provides His love, help and protection but it's up to you to seek Him and get it.

For a while, because of the songs I listen to sometimes, the articles and books I read, I felt that I lacked confidence in myself,no self esteem, I was too dependent on others, didn't want to be alone, and didn't know what I wanted or kow what my goals were. That is, until now. I tried to map out my goals on paper but I never could figure out how. It never made sense to me. Well, guess waht...Who cares!

I can tell you this..
I know what I want in life. I want a whole lotta things. I want to be a certified personal trainer and nutritionist. I wnat to help others make the weightloss struggle a little easier. I want to be there for someone who may feel alone or lonely. I want to help someone that doesn't catch on or just doesn't get it right now. I want to be a coach to jr. high or high school teams. Do I know which sport? Nope! I'm sure GOd will put me where He feels I', needed most. I'm going to be an online teacher. That way I can do whatever else I want to do or don't want to do during the day.
I will have my own gym built one day. There will be more activities and programs for kids to get involved in. I will have my own house built and will have a car in the garage that I paid cash for.
I am working on starting a book club for the kids in the community I live in, by January. Last but not least, I want my own bookstore, with a books written by me on a display table, hoping I can get more copies in because they are flying off the shelves!

I know what I want in my life, without a shadow of doubt. I also know it will take a lot of hard work, discipline and prayer. I can't do it by myself.
I also know that I dont need a man to make me feel confident or complete but I do want my life partner to share my good and bad days with me. I feel that is the missing ingredient in my life. I know that God hasn't forgotten about me and he will show up in due time.
Maybe I will do everything I listed and more. Maybe I'll only accomplish one or 2 things. Maybe I'll accomplish something that I never thought I would be going. Whatever it is, I know I will succeed in it.

I was fighting back tears when I started writing this and have been for the last few days. I was feeling like I didn't love myself enough or wasn't confident enough or didn't have enough faith. What I know now is, If I didn't have confidence, love or faith, you know good and well I would not be here right now. I also felt like God wasn't by my side and thought he had forgotten about me. Maybe He just alloed me to feel this way for a moment so I can get this out. Maybe this message right here is for you. Maybe this is the message you needed to recieve to help you get to the next level in your life. Maybe this isn't about me. It's about you. He's there with you this very moment. Stop beating yourself up. Be unique, be different. If your a blogger, blog you. Speak from your heart. Stop spending hours and energy reading people's books and blogs about how to make yours better or how to make six figures or become a millionaire through your blog. You don't have to change the way you write or what you say.
Let what worked for them, work for them. Write from your heart, your mind, your experience. Your blessings will follow. Be you!

This is an amazing song. Just listen to it, let it speak to you.

I got this from a yahoo group I'm in. Thought I would share it!

There was a very  gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country."Is there  anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk.
 "Only the Ten Commandments. " answered the lady.

There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news.
The good  news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets ."

A Sunday School teacher began her  lesson with a question,
"Boys and girls, what do we  know about God?"
A hand shot up in the air. "He is an  artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really? How do  you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - Our  Father, who does art in Heaven...  "

I know it's not summer anymore but I just had to let you know about an awesom product I came across online a couple years ago. It's called Cold Seat.
It's a frozen car seat cover you but on your childs carseat in the summer time. Like if you go to the mall or somewhere for a long period of time, you put this frozen cover over your child's carseat before you get out so when you get back in the car, you don't have to worry about the hot seat burning your childs legs. This product is worth it and I would buy it all over again. Check it out!

My daughter has an assignment she is working on with another student. I know they had to pick a topic and she said her friend chose "Why we shouldn't have homework." As I read it, I thought " I have got to share this with you!" ( I typed this exactly how she wrote it. She is 10 years old.)

“Why shouldn’t we have homework?”
Well, it wastes time! You know we have to do our chores! And we have to go to bed on time. Also, our mom has us to do other many things.
Why else shouldn’t we have homework?
Well because it’s paper (most of the time). Paper is made from trees. And the trees produce air so we could breathe. Imagine what it’s like to have absolutely no trees where you love. How sad and “airless.”
Anything else? Hmmm. Well because we would have to work on the other important things. Like planning a schedule. Or help my brother on things. Or help my sisters on things.
In conclusion, always remember to forget the homework (not really)!
Actually, always remember to do your homework, do your work in school, and do your best always!

Why does Love Hurt?
11 Best answers

1. It is the absence of mutual love that hurts.

2. Loving someone for the wrong reasons or loving only certain qualities. Not loving the whole person.

3. Loving the wrong person. You put your heart and soul out there and it gets mistreated.

4. You don’t fully understand what love is or what it means to love unconditionally.

5. You have too many expectations. It’s like you’re saying I will love you if… Many people think love has rules. There are no rules to love.

6. You blame love but it isn’t love that hurts. What hurts is being lied to, cheated on, abused, neglected, rejected, mistreated, etc.

7. You don’t have self-love. The only love to yourself is the love you expect from the other person. When you truly love yourself, the extra demand is lifted off of the other person and you can enjoy true love.

8. You are in love with how the person makes you feel and not necessarily loving the other person.

9. You don’t know how to handle or control your emotions. You take things personal.

10. You expect the fairy tale you see on television. You compare your love/relationship to someone else’s and when it doesn’t add up or look like that other image you have in your mind, you feel let down or hurt.

11. You don’t agree to disagree. You can be in love with someone who doesn’t like the same things as you or doesn’t think like you. Hey, that’s probably what drew you to them in the first place. Their uniqueness!

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So many today don't have enough food or money to get food for a good Thanksgiving. I thank You, Father, for Your blessings to me and my family, but my heart is heavy for those who don't have enough. Please, Lord, in Jesus name, I pray You would pour out Your blessings on those who have none. Remind me of my wonderful blessings so I will share what I have. If I see a need, whatever it may be, if I can supply it, move me to supply it. Thank You, Lord,
In Jesus name,

(I got this through a yahoo group I'm in and thought I would share.)

Prioritize your Priorities:
What’s more important?

"Child, car, bank account in the plus? The little things on the side that you want?
Music components? Clothes when you get ready?
Money to come home when you want or have?
Look before you leap.
Think before you speak.
Use the best gift God gave you.
And that is common sense.
Remember, that a fool and his money will soon depart. Don’t let that be you."

Dad Registered & Protected

My dad wrote this a few years before he died. He really cared for me, siblings just as much. I was the baby of the family. My dad always said I was hard headed. I didn't quite understand this at the time. It didn't mean a whole lot to me because I didn't think I had really experienced life to this level yet. Everything my dad has said and taught me makes sense now. I just wish he was here now to see how the seed he planted sprouted so beautifully. He belived that if you train up a child in the way he ought to go, he won't depart from it so that tells me he knows!

Today my dad would be 64. He died a few years back. Although he isn't here. he left so much for me and my siblings. I thank God I had him as my dad. If you ask anyone who knows me well, they would agree that I'm a bit of a daddy's girl. I really miss him. I thought I would allow you to read something my dad wrote for me a while ago.

A Father’s Love

"The bible says that a hoary head, which is to say a grey head, is a crown of wisdom is it’s found in the way of the Lord. Well my head is white, and I’ve been with God quite a few years.
My children are the crown of my creation, if God will permit me to put it that way. The bible also says to raise up a child in that way they ought to go, so that when he/she is old they won’t depart from it. Many times during that endeavor, the kids think that you are crazy, or maybe even don’t love them.
Never deviate from right just to prove that you love them. To them, sometimes right seems cruel or wrong. Sometimes love is tough.
A dad can’t be a buddy, a partner , a friend.
In a father, all of these virtues are found; they are factory built by God to matter to a child at the point of life when it means the most. When it pays dividends to the child that never made an investment."
James Byrd

1.Time management skills

2.Don't take things personally.(This one is important!)

3.Take smart risk.

4.Set clear boundries

5.Do the unexpected!

6.Be unforgetable.

7.Learn now to create passive income.

8.Be able to forgive yourself.

9.Learn to make quick decisions.

10.Learn to cook at least the basics.

I came home from choir practice and looked up the song we sang "Worthy is the Lamb." I normally do that so I can practice at home. I love the harmony in that song.
I looked on You Tube for the song and I found a video with clips from Passion of Christ and the song was playing in the background. I was listening to the song and was pretty zoned out. My son came up and was watching the video with me. After the video was over, my son had this look on his face, like he was stunned at what he just saw. I wasn't thinking while the video was playing that he shouldn't be watching this.
He asked "why did that do that to Jesus? Are they going to do that to me?" He was scared and at the same time "worried about Jesus." I did my best to explain how God sent Jesus to save us. Jesus knew this was going to happen and He was brave enough to do this for us. I told him this wasn't going to happen to him, God will protect him. From then on, my son was scared to be upstairs alone, sleep alone, even shower in the bathroom with the door shut. He thought these people were going to come for him.
This was the turning point in his praye life. Prior to this, he was asked pray on youth sunday in front of the church. I never told him what to say. He did really well. After that day, I would have all my kids come together and i would have one pray, they would say amen, and i would have the next one pray, until we all prayed. I did this to show them you can pray about anything and everything. People pray and talk to God many different ways and say many different things. I wanted my kids to know they can talk to God about whatever was on their minds.
After the night of seeing the Passion of Christ video , he prayed every night and every day. He would come to me before bed and ask "Mom, can we pray?"
Now if any of you don't know, this is a moment when the devil feels like stepping in. See, when your household and your life is all unorganized and chaotic, your confused, depressed, everyone arguing nd fighting, the devil is satisified. His work there is done. But when we began to pray and seek God, the devil wasn't having that. I started getting more frustrated. Some nights when my son would ask me can we pray, i would tell him I'm busy or not right now and I would tell him to go lay down and say a pray to himself.
It was brought to my attention by my spiritual father, my counselor, that  this was the devil trying to disrupt the good thing we had going on. That was THE moment I NEEDED to pray. You can't let the devil win. That's how you fight back. That moment your down and out, or broken, don't feel like praying or seeking God, that's the moment you must do it. If you want to get out of that hole your in, you have to reach out.
When your going through your day and things happen, something comes up, things go wrong, don't think the worse. Don't say why me? Here's an example. Let's say your getting ready for work in the morning and you can't find your keys and you get really frustrated and angry because you are going to be late for work. I'll tell you what I would think... What if that was God's way of stalling you to avoid that accident or some other type of disaster? If you didn't get that job or promotion, maybe it's God saying you arent ready or maybe he's protecting you from something or someone. Maybe he has a better job, a better promotion just waiting for you. He puts us right where he wants us for our blessings, we just have to listen.
Keep praying. Keep holding on. God does not force us to come to Him. He does not force us to take his hand or His help. He is always right there, with you, beside you, waiting for you.

If you had no fear of anything at all, what 10 things would you do?

You may be suprised to know that there is a difference between weightloss and fatloss. I was reading this article below and thought it explained it perfect.
Focusing on losing fat will help you reach your goal. There are 3 main ways your body loses weight: Dehydration, Lean weight loss which is from muscle, and fat loss. You want to target fatloss and combine it with increased lean mass. Check this out..

Fat Burning Fitness Program Free Workout Videos Weight Loss Tips and Tricks: Weight Loss 101

So..This award was passed to me! Yay! I feel special! Well I'll continue with the "Oscar" speech lol.Thank you Kandyland! Thank my supporter and encourager! Thank my readers! Now I have to share 7 things about me to accept this award..

1. Im addicted to my computer. I'm here 23/7!
2. I do not like or use public restrooms unless I absolutely have NO choice!
3. My favorite breakfast is Turkey bacon, eggs (smart balance), and cheese sandwich.
4. My favorite color is pink.
5. I love smoothies
6. I stay up late until I fall over.
7. My favorite physical activity is Turbo Kick.
Bonus: I want to be a teacher and coach in the near future.

I also have to pass this award to 12 awesome bloggers in order to keep this award.
Stay tuned...

If you could have been told one thing that you weren't told when you were a teenager, what would you like to have heard?

(You can use this for your personal writing or you can respond right here!)

The next time you munch on a bag of delicious potato chip, you are snacking on one of the world's most popular snacks and guess what? It was invented by a black man.

George Crum was a half Native American and half African American man who lived in Saratoga Lake, New York. He worked as a chef at a restaurant at the Moon Lake Lodge resort in Saratoga Springs, New York. French Fries were very popular at this restaurant. One day on August 24,1853 Crum was doing his job, cooking and serving up food to customers, when one particular customer kept complaining about the french fries being way too thick. Eventually Crum became extremely frustrated from the rudeness and complaining so he decided to get back at the customer. Crum sliced the french fries so thin, you couldn't even pick it up with a fork, over fried them and added extra salt to it. Crum did this in hopes to annoy this customer. He then served it to the complaining customer who suprisingly loved them. This marked the day that Saratoga Chips became popular. Crum's chips were originally called Saratoga Chips and potato crunches. They were soon packaged and sold in New England. In 1860, Crum opened his own restaurant, where he placed a small basket of his famous potato chips in a basket on every table in the store. It wasn't long at all before Crum was selling his potato chips to many wealthy clients. Crum's restaurant closed around 1890 and he died in 1914 at the age of 92.

"Back in those days, African Americans were not allowed to take out patents on their inventions" says Grant-Britton, author of the textbook Holt African American History, so it was never patented. Crum didn't live long enough to see his invention become a popular grocery store item by Herman Lay begenning in 1895.

                    What is your favorite thanksgiving dish and tradition? 

The reason weight loss seems so impossible is because of the impossible expectations we put on our body and health. Most of the time, you focus on what you can’t eat. You think of eating for weight loss means you have to eat things you don’t like or can’t afford.
Definition of diet:
The deliberate selection of food to control body weight or nutrient intake.
the foods eaten, as by a particular person or group
such a selection or a limitation on the amount a person eats for reducing weight

When it comes to weight loss or should I say fat loss, we want to lose it not now but right now!
I’m here to tell you, there isn’t a healthy or safe, quick way to lose weight. You have to come to terms with that fact. This is the point where you need to stop complaining and whining, get up and do what it takes! You can’t take the easy way out and expect awesome, long term results. Again, you will get out what you put in.
Ask yourself “why do I want or need to lose weight?” You have to want it for the right reasons. If you do it because your boyfriend wants you to or because you want to look like that model, or because your son or daughter came at you with the fat comment, you are setting yourself up for failure. You have to want it for yourself, for your health. You have to love yourself enough to know that you deserve to be healthy, to look good and feel good, but you have to work your ass off! Literally!

I looked up one of my favorite celebrities. I once admired her to the point where I used to keep a picture of her close by to help motivate me into getting off my butt and making good decisions so I can look like her someday. I can tell you this right now, Beyonce’s  body does not get or stay the way it is just because she has money in her pocket. Maybe she does spend quite a bit more on having someone train her or help her but guess what? Beyonce is the one who has to work her ass off.  Please excuse me for being a bit harsh but I’m tired of people ( including myself) complaining and coming up with excuses to why I can’t lose weight and keep it off.
I’m going to give you an idea of what Beyonce does on a regular basis to keep her body looking good.
She has her breakfast of course. ( DON’T SKIP BREAKFAST!) Food is fuel. You need it to get through the day like your vehicle needs fuel to get you where you want it to take you. Your body is no different.
After breakfast, she does a half hour of cardio followed by 45 minutes of free weights. She runs 4 miles in 40 minutes, 6 times a day. She does yoga once a week for strength, conditioning and toning.
She also adds in 2 of her favorite activities, biking and dancing for burning extra calories. She avoids red mean, bread and alcohol. She eats plenty of veggies, is on a low fat, low carb and low calorie diet. She is mostly focused on cardio.
Cardio is where you will burn most of your fat, especially in the abdominal area. Sometimes she turns on her favorite song and does bicep curls during the whole song to burn out.
This rigorous fitness routing and disciplined eating habits really does require a lot of motivation. But what’s it worth to ya? It will take sacrifice and a lot of mental strength and you have to push yourself.
One thing I would suggest you do is focus on adding things to your diet. Try a variety of different fruits and vegetables. It seems like I see a different kind of apple I never seen or heard of before. Adding variety in your meals gives you a bigger variety of nutrients, antioxidants, vitamins and many other things your body needs to get you through your day.  A fruit smoothie is a good idea. Throw a few different pieces of fruit in a blender with some ice, sometimes I add a touch of honey for energy and also flax seed. Mix it up and voila! You have a delicious healthy snack or it’s even good for breakfast. (DON’T SKIP BREAKFAST!)You can’t forget about the water. Keep yourself hydrated. Being dehydrated robs the best of you. It drains your energy and you struggle trying to get through your day and driving yourself nuts trying to figure out why you’re dragging.
Don’t skip out on the physical activity! I like to call it physical activity because most people don’t like the idea of exercising just like no one likes the word diet. Physical activity isn’t just running and doing extremely vigorous exercise. Walk the dog, race the kids, play hide and seek. Jump rope, turn your music on and dance! Take a zumba class. My favorite physical activity is Turbo Kick. I enjoyed it so much I became a Turbo Kick Instructor. Even cleaning around the house can make you break a sweat. Getting them arms up to dust the fan or clean the mirror. My arms were sore after I manually cleaned my carpet with the Woolite rug stick.
What it all boils down to is this.. stop wasting your money on fad diets, crazy diet pills and all the other miracle offers that are out there. They will tell you and show you exactly what you want to hear to get your money. Don’t fall for it. Take a deep breath, look yourself in the mirror and say “You deserve this!” Like my favorite quote or saying says
“God wants your availability rather than your ability. “
You don’t have to run 6 miles in 40 minutes like Beyonce. You don’t even have to wish and dream your body could look like hers. We are all unique.
Do it for health, strength and for the love of yourself. You deserve it!

"For anything worth having one must pay the price; and the price is always work, patience, love, self-sacrifice"

All relationships require work, 100% from both or all involved, but it takes a special kind of love to withstand the challenges that come in a long distance relationship.
• The first and #1 thing I would tell you before getting into a long distance relationship is to make sure you have a partner whom you know for sure, without a doubt that they will work just as hard as you in making and keeping the relationship strong, at a distance as well as in person. Don’t ask if a long distance relationship can work. Anything can work if you make it work. Again, you will get out what you put in.
• You both need to discuss and agree on expectations. Make it known and be clear about what you expect and what’s important to you.
• Have a plan. How long will you two be separated? Depending on what has caused your distance, come up with a plan whether it be 3 months, 6 months or even longer. It is important to have a goal in mind. It’s something to focus on. When times get a little tough, you get to missing each other you can at least count down the days. Be creative!
• Communication is imperative in any relationship. Always let your partner know how you feel, what you’re thinking, even your likes, dislikes, wants, needs, anxieties, worries, fears, etc. Be open in communicating. Do not assume your partner can read your mind or knows what you’re thinking and feeling. Have your important conversations on the phone or even video. Your partner can’t hear the emotion coming from the words you type. You might say something in a joking way but your partner might take it seriously and vice versa.
• Raise your trust level as best as you can. Keep the lines of communication open. If things don’t add up, it will come to light. Lack of trust can be your downfall in your relationship.
• Be creative. Take pictures, this allows your partner to feel more connected and more involved in your life. Write a letter, send a card or post cared. Writing letters are more personal. Make a love journal or scrapbook. 100 reasons I love you, write a letter a day, write about your day and when you thought about them, write lyrics to a song or poem that made you think about them.
• Schedule a weekend or a time to visit each other. Plan a mini vacation. Make it special. Be creative. Put some thought into it. Let your partner know they are special and really mean something to you and your life.
• Don’t let your negative thoughts or the negative thoughts and comments from others affect your relationship. This is your relationship. Think positive. Keep busy but stay focused on the goal. The goal is to unite with your partner and carry on with your life together.
• Share each other’s passions. Get involved. Show concern about their day, their night, work, school or whatever it may be. Stay connected at all times. Don’t leave anything you do to be questioned by your partner. Unless of course it’s a wonderful surprise for them!
• Put your partner and your relationship first. You have to schedule your relationship into your life. Make it a priority. Make the necessary sacrifices for your partner and relationship. Protect your relationship. Never forget, what you put in to your relationship is what you will get out. Do not let the enemy take what’s most important to you.
• Last but certainly not least, don’t give up on this beautiful relationship. You are blessed to have your partner. Fight for it, work for it, work through it. Don’t let it go!

"Things that are easily acquired, obtained, or maintained, without any effort or sacrifice lack's human nature."

A couple years ago when I made the choice to make some changes in my life, attitude and behavior, I started finding things like motivational quotes, sayings and I printed it put, used my scrapbook scissors with different designs and I would cut it out and staple or glue it to some colored paper. I would make it decorative and I put it up on my bulletin board, by my desk or anywhere I thought I would need that boost or motivation. I took one down and thought I would share it with you... ( I did not write this, I just found it on the internet a couple years ago.)
1. Stop Worrying. Worry kills life.

2. Begin each day with a prayer. It will arm your soul.

3. Control appetite. Over-indulgence clogs body and mind.

4. Accept your limitations...

5. Don't envy. It wastes time and energy.

6. Have faith in people. Cynicism sours the disposition.

7. Find a hobby. It will relax your nerves.

8. Read a book a week to stimulate imagination and broaden your views.

9. Spend some time alone for the peace of solitude and silence.

10. Try to want what you have, instead of spending your strength trying to get what you want.

I wake up this morning and the first thing I did was turn to msnbc. I don't normally do that but for some reason I did without hesitation. I see a mother heart broken, telling her story about her innocent 18 year old teenage son's brutal, senseless beating.

A couple girls were given permission to have a house party and were only expecting about 10 people. Turns out that about 60 to 80 people showed up instead. The parents of the teens began telling people to leave. Supposedly, a coupele girls got in a fight. Witnesses say that one of the girls hit a guy. The guy said he wouldn't hit a girl but he would hit the next guy that walks by. Bobby TIll man shows up to the party, being the "next person" that walks by,
A witness says one of the suspects asked Bobby "What you lookin at?" Bobby says, "What you looking at" and eventually they went after him.
The suspects had already been in a fight prior to Bobby's arrival. A witness said one of the suspects said the next person that walks by will "feel my wrath". As one of the suspects started beating on Bobby, others joined in on the beating. There were many people who stood by and watched. No one helped. Even a neighber stood watching out of his window and in his interview he said "I thought he was hurt. I never though his life was ending." He did call the police. Should he have done something more? Was calling the police enough? If he would have gone outside to help, do you think he would have made a difference or could it have gotten worse?
Bobby Tillman died from blunt force trauma to the head and a rupture heart. The coroner said that the type of injuries Bobby suffered from were injuries you see in a car accident. Bobby was about 5'6" and aboout 125lbs. He was stomped, kicked and punched to death.
Bobby was described as "a sweet young man destined for greatness." Bobby's mother recently moved from Los Angeles to Atlanta, Georgia thinking it was safer.
The police are still looking for more suspects. Of course, the 4 suspects they have in custody are all pointing the fingers at eachother.
One thing I can't stand is a coward. What is wrong with our youth? Is it the fault of the parents? The community? The songs on the radio? What can we do to ensure things like this doesn't happen? Bobby's mother says she doesn't want his death to be in vain. She wants the suspects to get the justice they deserve. She also wants to reach out to our youth, give them, show them strength to stand up to bullies like this or even prevent this from happening. Even if we can make a difference in just one person's life or help change one person's attitude.
This is a time when we all need to pray about this. This is something we can not do alone. Always pray for our youth, our community, our world period. This broke my heart as well seeing this. We see things like this many times on the news, and you never think your child's face will be the face you see posted all over the place. Let's keep this family and the rest of our communities in our prayers.

How do you define an Independent Woman? Here are a few responses..

"An independent woman is one that does not have to factor in finances when considering marrying a man or when divorcing one. Way too many marriages are ones not out of love, but out of the need for convenience and financial need. An independent woman usually has worked for some time to be independent or has a certain set of special skills that has allowed her to obtain financial freedom.
When I think of an Independent woman it is hard to not think about money or a job, but that is not all that makes an Independent woman. A woman who is strong in her convictions, lives rights and is not easily swayed by the status quo is also an independent woman. Many people will refer to a woman like this as a "Bitch" but in reality it comes out of spit, Jealously of the fact that she is not someone who can be controlled or manipulated."

"an independent women to me is some one who got they head on they shoulders doin somthin wit dey life off rip,a go getta she can make somthing happen without relying on another muthafucka to do somthing for her. If she got a man hopefully a good man she can meet him at the table 50/50,...she not cocky or sadety just confident,basically knows how to provide for her self,hold her own down."

"handling her business, classy, makin it happen regardless (meaning with or without a man) keeping her self up. last but not least patience this is an important factor b/c a woman that has all these qualities wont b independent 2 long we all know good things come 2 those who wait."

"what makes a women independent hmmm...... knowing she can do anything she wants and doing it all by her damn self."

I love these responses! Now for my opinion..
(Confident, Assertive, Decisive, determined, perseveres, ethical, strong sense of self, common sense, stands up for self, godly, educated, just to name a few.)
I believe an "Independent woman" is one who can go through each day of her life and face the good and bad, go through her storms and still come out smiling and ready to take on whatever comes next. Many people, especially men feel a woman isn't independent unless she is financially stable on her own. Is this the true definition of an "Independent Woman?"
Women face many situations and challenges in life each day. Sometimes women get themselves in these situations, sometimes it's only by circumstance. Some women don't have a choice. Take myself for an example..
I graduated from high school and went straight to the military. I got pregnant and got married while at my first duty station and got out soon after. I spent about 10 years being a stay at home mom. My spouse was always deployed or Tdy. I spent more than half those years being a single parent to 4 kids. It was tough raising 4 kids and moving from this place to that place with 4 kids. Some were in school, some weren't. Instead of working, I decided to at least go to school, start on a degree and I did home daycare during all of that. That was a lot for me at the time. I didn't know then as much as I know now so all I could do was work with what I had. Eventually, after 10 years we separated. I got up one day and decided to leave. I went home and stayed with my mom for several months. I was completely dependent on my mom and kids father for financial support. I had a hard time finding a job that will benefit me financially and also finding hours that fit me and my family as well. I didn't have a job for 7 months. Keep in mind, although I am financially dependent on someone else (like most of you who have jobs, you DEPEND on your employer to pay you right??) I still have to raise my 4 kids pretty much by myself, keep the house tidy, keep shoes and clothes on their back, pursuing 3 different certifications in Personal Training, Fitness Nutrition and  Fitness and Exercise Therapy, while in the middle of pursuing a degree in Strength, Nutrition and Personal Training. I also was in a car accident where my car was totaled and the crazy people who hit me at 60+ mph ran from the scene and all I had was a busted black swollen eye. I was pretty much knocked backwards. I felt like I failed myself, kids and anyone else I cared about. I had to realize that God wasn't done with me because if he was I would not be here to tell about it. I am right back where I started and pretty much dependent on someone financially, for a limited time only but I sure as hell believe I fit the "Independent Woman" status because I have been through so much and I am using it as fuel for my life.
I am always taking on a lot more than the average woman, all at one time and all I can do is thank God for the strength,  my health and those who love me and encourage me everyday and I pray that I do the same for someone else.
I Corinthians  11:11,12
"But remember that in God's plan men and women need each other. For although the first woman came out of man, all men have been born from women ever since, and both men and women come from God their creator."

I'll end this by saying, remember we all need each other. We will all need some type of help or support from one person or another in our lifetime. Don't knock down that woman in your life whom you know does the best she can ever day, gives her all every day, loves you no matter what every day, stays strong and gets back up every day no matter what crap comes her way. Always let her know she is appreciated, Independent or not!

"Accomplishment, leading to self-esteem, is not just about doing something.. it is about the courage to persist through pain, failure, and self doubt." These are the words from Laura Schlessinger from the book Ten Stupid Things Women do to Mess up Their Lives.
Many people, as well as myself are always looking for that quick fix or that magical pill or even magic period, to change things in our lives. Folks these days don't want to work for anything, don't want to put any time and effort into anything. It's like this world is impatient, lazy and people are taking the value and worth out of life. There is advice, encouragement, motivation and tips and how-to's for everything in life but what it boils down to is you. You have to make a conscious effort to change or improve anything in your life wether it be losing weight, passing a class, or changing your financial status. How bad to you want the changes and improvements you need in your life?
My biggest downfall in life period is fear, and not knowing. I now understand what it means to feel the fear and do it anyway. You aren't always going to meet everyone's standards or do things the way someone else would. I am some what of a perfectionist. When I do something or prepare to do something, I want it to be awesome right then. When I started blogging, I wanted to skip the beginning, I wanted to skip going through what it takes and just jump right to the end. I wanted to see that I was making a difference in someone's life immediately. I wanted instant success, but I know things don't happen this way.
My whole point is that we have to find our strength and esteem within God and ourselves first. When I fail or don't meet someone else's standards, I have to know within myself "hey, I know that didn't work out but that doesn't mean Im not good enough or good at all." You have to be able to fail and stand back up and do what you need to do to make it better next time, adjust, dust yoruself off and re-focus. It takes work, hard work, perseverence and determination among many other things to keep yourself in the game and going strong. Please don't give up or quit. If one road or way doesn't get you there, take or make another route. You will get there if you keep going!

"Yesterday I dared to struggle. Today I dared to win."

I am very passionate about my relationships, especially with the one I love. The beginning of a new relationship is always the best and the easiest part. Growing and maintaining a healthy relationship is a bit more difficult for a lot of people. It doesn't have to be so difficult.
Think about it, of all the things that we deal with and go through each and everyday, your relationship with your significant should be the last thing you have to worry about. When you go home at the end of the day, that relationship, your partner should be your comfort, your safe haven. A relationship is not 50/50. It is and should always be 110/110. If you put in anything less than that, that's what you should expect to get out of it.
In order to have a successful , life long healthy relationship, it must include some important ingredients. You must first love yourself and also know what your needs are. You have to be confident in yourself and know your own worth before you can be in a successful relationship.
It's imperative to to seek God first for all of your needs and wants. He already knows what we need and the desires of our hearts. If you seek Him first, everything else will fall into place. You can even ask Him to show you how to love your partner, to love them through you. He will do it! All you have to do is ask and have that desire in your heart. That is when the seed of a healthy long lasting relationship is planted. It is then up to you to nurture and water that seed so it will continue to grow.Special nutrients are needed to ensure this precious seed given to you and planted for you, grows strong and stays alive.
There of course is no such thing as a perfect person or a perfect relationship.If you have this mindset, that will be a big downfall for you. You must do more than your best, put in all you can humanly possible into your relationship.
The most important nutrient is prayer. Pray for your partner as well as yourself. Ask God to show you what you are missing. Ask Him to show you things you need to see or what you need to know about yourself and your partner. Pray together, stay together.God does work in mysterious ways. He works in His time but on time.
Value and respect your partner. Be certain your partner always knows without a shadow of doubt that of course after God, he/she comes first. In my relationship, I have to know that I am number one. I'm not saying he would have to ditch everything he's doing for me. If I love him I definitely wouldn't expect that. But when it comes down to it, I have to know that no matter who walks by or no matter what anyone says or does, Im the one and the only one. Your partner should not have to ask or wonder how you feel about them. Let him/her know you appreciate him.
Keep the lines of communication open. Wether good or bad don't hesitate to tell your partner how you feel. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Always do it in a respectful way. We are not good mind readers. Don't be too quick to assume or jump to conclusions. This is another downfall in relationships. Actions always speaks louder.
Intimacy is extremely important with me. It is essential in relationships. Intimacy is more than just sex. It's when you experience a closeness with your partner. Pillow talk, hold hands, cuddle, dinner and a movie. Do something special for and with each other. This strengthens your bond as well.
There are many creative ways to let your partner know how you feel about them. A few of my ideas are:
1. Make a love journal or scrap book. I have a one and the first page I used stickers to say "I found my smile again." As I start to eventually fill in the pages, my partner will see what makes me smile! I have also made a love journal. This is good especially when you don't live with your partner or maybe if they are deployed or just away. It's still a good idea even if you see him everyday. Write the things you never said, the things you don't express everyday. You will be amazed at how love makes you a poet or an awesome writer.
2. Make a cd with songs letting your partner know how they make you feel and what you think of them, Think of it like an audio love letter.
Go out of your way, be creative, be original. Flirt, date, make little love coupons for your partner to use anytime. One of my favorite sites to get ideas from is loving continue to add value to your relationship. It's not always about the money you spend but the thought and the effort you put into it. Remember you get what you give. These are only a few things that holds the foundation of your relationship together. Don't give up on your partner. Don't give up on yourself.

Partnership of Success

Success is a partnership between thought and action. One
Without the other will not get you anywhere.

If you think about what you do and how you'll do it, but do
Nothing, the result is failure. If you rush into getting it
Done without putting any thought into it, that will just as
Surely bring failure.

It's crucial to put some good, solid thinking into what you
Wish to do. Be careful, though, not to think yourself out of
Ever getting it done.

Whatever your objective, it's absolutely necessary to take
Action. Yet it is also vital to take appropriate action that
Is well thought out.

You can think and you can do. Each is challenging in its own
Way, and yet every valuable thing you've ever accomplished
Has utilized these two skills that you most certainly have.

You have what it takes to reach whatever goal you choose.
Think and do, then think some more and do some more, and
Steadily work your way toward success.

~~Ralph Marston

Ive been saying and planning for so long to start a blog. I have so many ideas and things to do with it but guess what, all it is right now is words on a piece of paper. I can sit here and think and plan and come up with all these amazing ideas but these ideas are not going to jump off the paper and come to life by itself. So guess what im doing.. the damn thang! I am one who over thinks things. Im sure there will be many times in my life when it's best to over think and re think things. I found as I sit with all my journals and notebooks full of words and plans, nothing happens. It will eventually be something interesting for those that know me to see all my juicy secrets when im gone lol, but right now I want to bring it all to life!
I have also let fear hold me hostage for too long. I fear so many things and I end up either over preparing to make sure certain things don't happen or I avoid it. Kind of like this blog. Im not afraid to write. I love writing! I just don't feel that my writing is awesome enough to put out there for millions of people to read, but I always hear others tell me I should write a book. Sometimes, many times we don't always see the beauty in ourselves, but listen to others when they tell you about it. Im really hard on myself. I'm kind of like a perfectionist. Not that i'm perfect but I want everything I do to be perfect. If I don't feel I can make it perfect, I won't do it at all until I feel I can make it perfect. I noticed that nothing gets done that way. There is no waiting for the right time or the perfect time. Our "right time" may pass us right on by. Do it now... Just do the damn thang!